The love and fear of aging…

As time progresses,
and we each grow older,
our eyes open a little more,
day by day.

When young we only experience and observe.
But with age comes understanding, and interest,
our natural tendancies leading us towards that which we naturally enjoy;
towards those things from which we derive personal satisfaction.

I have found that with age, and the more I learn,
the more I realise that there is to learn,
and the more that I wish to learn,
and that it drives my understanding of the world around me ever higher.

I never used to fear death,
the only fear had been of the way that I die.
But now I start to fear
that the ever-increasing reverence for life, building within me,
will reach a stage where the very idea of everything ending becomes unbearable.

I cannot see sense in believing that there is another experience after death.
I can only see that what makes me, me, will end,
that my conscious experience of the world around me will cease,
and that I will no longer be able to witness a sunrise,
a falling raindrop, or the changes of colour in the autumn leaves.

But as a warrior of life, and with what I’ve learned so far,
I know that with furrowed brow and a small, but strong smile, I should focus on the now,
for this moment leads to the next, and that moment to another,
and though each moment could be the last,
I’ve learned to love life, and I’ve learned it disappears fast.

One should try to be like cornflower paste

13th Oct ‘11 (taken from my personal journal)

In pursuing the attributes of a Peaceful Warrior,
one should try to be like cornflower paste.
When attacked by something hard and fast, it appears solid,
but if pushed gently, it can be made to flow, like water.

The essence of weakness in strength

3^rd Oct ‘11 (taken from my personal journal)

To speed up when you want to slow down,
to be quiet when you want to shout,
to listen when you want to be heard,
to say ‘yes’ when you want to say ‘no’,
to let go when you want to hold on,
and to walk away when you want to fight.

To learn how to be strong enough to be weak,
is what creates the warrior within.
The one who has the self-control to do,
that which is right, not that which is desired.
The essence of weakness in strength,
is the essence of the Peaceful Warrior.